The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Planewalkers
Being a Collection of Knowledge offered by members of the Planewalker’s Guild. Whether this is part of an unrelated smattering of arbitrarily assigned rules or from a Planewalker’s Manual, it is unclear.
1. Try everything… Once.
2. Learn when to take your beliefs and pike them – staying alive is more important.
6. Leap at the chance to travel through uncharted portals.
8. Learn when leaping is a bad idea.
10. Earn the trust of everyone you meet – you never know when you’ll need bodies to put between you and the Blood War.
11. Don’t trust everyone you meet.
14. Make deals, but only ones that don’t cost you anything or are extremely easy to back out of.
15. Learn how to back out of difficult deals.
16. Learn the exceptions to Rule 1.
20. Learn which uncharted portals to research and which to blindly enter.
23. Drink everything… Once.
26. Cause trouble, and have fun doing it.
28. Remember that while Belief fuels the Multiverse, even though you believe you are safe, you are Wrong.
29. Never make a deal with a devil.
30. Never make a deal with a demon.
39. Learn when to hire an expert, even if it’s a job you know you can do very well.
40. When possible, get insurance on the expert.
45. Cultivate a healthy sense of paranoia.
47. Always remember Rule 46.
48. Love often, but unless you use protection, never love a Succubus.
50. Drink everything that doesn’t kill you… frequently.
51. Never get yourself into something that a liberal application of alcohol, big friends, and fire cannot get you out of.
53. Get into as many situations involving Rule 51 as possible.
62. Avoid causing an undue ruckus.
67. Make friends with a good attourney. You never know when you have to make a deal with something from the Lower Planes.
68. Make friends with a good attourney. You never know when you will end up in jail for crimes you’ve committed.
89. If you meet someone from the Prime Material Worlds, take pity on them. Take them under your wing. And most importantly… Take advantage of them.
90. Distrust any gnome who says that opening a portal to the Para-Elemental Plane of Steam is a good idea.
94. Open a portal, just because you can.
95. Find ways to close portals that you shouldn’t have opened.
96. Take up running as a profession.
99. Make friends with a good surgeon.
100. Try to avoid making friends with a Dustman… He may try and do you a favor and kill you.
101. Join the Blood War, but only as a spectator.
109. Cheat a fiend, if you can get away with it.
110. Cheat a celestial, even if you can’t.
112. Never turn your back on your friends, unless they’re providing a distraction to allow you to escape.