General Planescape Quotes

“The City of Doors, the Cage. I like to think of it as the City of Sods” – Annah, tiefling adventurer
“When a mind does not know itself, it is flawed. When a mind is flawed, the man is flawed. When a man is flawed, that which he touches is flawed. It is said that what a flawed man sees, his hands make broken.” – Dakon

In-game Quotes

“I’m going to drown. . in a wine bottle full of salt water.”
            -Alusair, the first incident with Shenvallei’s Water Bottle


“Any idea what that is Al?”
                        "Oh, aye! Its a great, big, sodding black stone buildin’ with a buncha piking spikey bits fer impalin’ Clueless primes on what ask too many bloody questions! DO I LOOK LIKE A BLEEDIN’ TOUT!?“
-”Fine. No more questions for Al. The sun is clearly getting to her."
            -Shenvallei and Alusair, on first sighting the Obsidian Castle.

“It reminds me of the temple of pies! A friendly halfling once visited our village and said his baked goods came from his god himself! This temple… could it be the temple of pies?”
            -Shenvallei, visiting the temple of Hanseath for the first time.. and not quite getting it.

“You came all this way, killed scores of minions, walked the multiverse in hopes at a thing you werent even sure existed?” – Shenvallei, referring to Fiona’s quest for a Planar Shard
Alusair: ”. . . whats so odd about that?”
– Alusair’s riposte

“Start talkin’, squirt. If you prove particularly cooperative I might put you back together and let you go.”
(Aside, to Fiona and Azuras)
                        "It’s best not to interrupt Al when she gets like this."
            -Alusair interrogating a Dust Mephit in the Center of the Multiverse (Session 18), and Shenvallei’s Response.

“WANTED: “ZERO”. FOR: EXTORTION, ROBBERY, THEFT, RAPE, MURDER, UNLAWFUL IMPRISONMENT OF HARMONIUM AGENTS, UNLAWFUL IMPRISONMENT OF CIVILIANS, UNLAWFUL IMPRISONMENT OF PRIMES, OWNING A CLUELESS WITHOUT A LICENSE, ARSON, OBSTRUCTING JUSTICE, AIDING AND ABETTING A FUGITIVE – MULTIPLE COUNTS, ACCOMPLICE TO MURDER, ILLEGAL POSESSION OF AN UNLICENSED KOBOLD."

            - A bounty poster, From the Adventures of Van Kellias.

“Something’s not right with these women.”
                  -“What makes you think that?”
“They seem overly eager to please. And angry at my denial. Not disappointed angry, agitated and extremely unhappy angry.”
                  -“Shen, think for a moment. Most men have no difficulty thinking with the proper ‘brain’ at a time line this. Now, tell me, why wouldn’t they be upset? You’ve rejected them after they’ve done everything they can to please you.”
            -Shen’vallei and Alusair when confronted with a nest of Athar houris.

“Her! This is the one that is spreading the rumors!”
                        -"Gods, save us from the wrath of the Clueless!
            -Shenvallei and Alusair, confronted with a false Jesebel.

“You really are clueless, aren’t you! This kind of thing doesn’t happen all of a sudden! I’m in love with you, and gods damned if I know why!”
                        -“You are under some spell because it is unnatural.”
            The false Jesebel, and Shen’vallei.

-“Its unnatural alright. I think she’s telling the bloody truth.”
            -Alusair’s riposte

“Hells, Shen, the only thing my faith did for me was make sure I understood there was no logic involved! This is love, you sodding Prime! You can’t learn that in a book! It doesn’t make sense because it ISN’T logical!”
                        -“There is logic in chaos and I will find it.”
            -Alusair, trying to explain “love” to the Clueless, and failing.

“Your conscience doesn’t worry about people drowning themselves in a blind panic, then? Good.”
“If they are foolish enough to do that, then its their fault.”
-Alusair and Shen’vallei

“Your honor, it may be presumptuous of me, but I have no small familiarity with bladecraft, and Shenvallei, were he to attempt killing anything larger than a duck, would be truly pitiful with a dagger.”
                  – Alusair, spoken in Shenvallei’s defense, at his trial