Symbol: A brimming beer stein next to, or on top of, a pie.
Home Plane: The Pie-m Material
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Portfolio: (Primary) Pie, baked goods. (Secondary) War, Carousing, Alcohol.
Worshipers: No significant following.
Cleric Alignments: CN, CE, NE.
Domains: Creation, Chaos, Strength, War
Favored Weapon: Great axe.
Once the dwarven god of alcohol, Hanseath is chaotic neutral aligned. He is also known as the Bearded One. Through a misunderstanding that is not clear to anyone, Hanseath has slowly changed his behaviors, and his worshipers find themselves having odd cravings for pie.
Hanseath represents the festive side of dwarven culture, best represented by a drunken feast. Brewers hold him in high regard and he is often worshiped by dwarf barbarians and any other dwarves who charge headlong into battle, caring not what the odds might be.
The Pierarchy of Hanseath
Hanseath’s worshippers have undergone a shift in their paradigm, and now are governed by the
8 Pieous Priests of the Divine Octopie (first come first serve) – an elite set of divine apiestles who commune directly with Hanseath. They each have an even slice (of the congregation), with 4 and 20 serveants each. They feast daily to receive his Word, and find that his Word is good. Each meeting is initiated with the following verse, recited by the High Pietrician:
Welcome to the Slice, my Brothers and Sisters.
Be it Known that All pies are equal in my sight, be it apple, cherry or other fruit. Meringues and Cheesecake being tarts, but hold the holy shape of the Pie God and are Good. The Quiche is a dinner pie, and is Good. As is Mincemeat. As is Cottage. As is Shepards. Cobblers have not the holy shape but hold the holy flavor and are Good. So sayeth the Pie God.
The Cake, being spongy and without substance, excepting empty calories, promises delight, but this is a Lie, as Cakes are wont to do. Hie ye to a delicious Pie, and thereon receive the blessing of thy Pie God, in the form of vitamins from the fruits or vegetables therein.
We are to remember him always, for He pied for our sins.
The Divine Octopie
- High Piestress of Savory – Umami
- Sultan of Savory – Phineas Pieous
- High Pietrician – Pontius Pielate
- -> Who’s this guy? THIS GUY IS AWESOME! -> Grantley Ephraim Cogswell-Smythe von Piedersen, Ultra-Super Mega-Pope Pieus DCCCXV
- Premiere Pieladin of Pastries – Poutine Pie-ladin
The Followers of the OctopieEach member of the Divine Octopie has followers numbering four and twenty.
|Granted Ability||Cast conjuration (creation) spells at +2 caster level||Casts Chaos spells at +1 caster level.|
|Level 1||Create Water||Protection from Law|
|Level 2||Minor Image||Shatter|
|Level 3||Create Food and Water||Magic Circle against Law|
|Level 4||Minor Creation||Chaos Hammer|
|Level 5||Major Creation||Dispel Law|
|Level 6||Heroes’ Feast||Animate Objects|
|Level 7||Permanent Image||Word of Chaos|
|Level 8||True Creation||Cloak of Chaos|
|Level 9||Genesis||Summon Monster IX|
|Granted Ability||You can perform a feat of strength as a supernatural ability. You gain an enhancement bonus to strength equal to your caster level. This lasts for one round and is usable once per day.||Free Martial Weapon Proficiency and Weapon Focus in the God’s favored weapon.|
|Level 1||Enlarge Person||Magic Weapon|
|Level 2||Bull’s Strength||Spiritual Weapon|
|Level 3||Magic Vestment||Magic Vestment|
|Level 4||Spell Immunity||Divine Power|
|Level 5||Righteous Might||Flame Strike|
|Level 6||Stoneskin||Blade Barrier|
|Level 7||Bigby’s Grasping Hand||Power Word, Blind|
|Level 8||Bigby’s Clenched Fist||Power Word, Stun|
|Level 9||Bigby’s Crushing Hand||Power Word, Kill|